January 31, 2016

elsie says

Elsie:  "My back hurts."
Me:  "Why?"
Elsie:  "Cause I'm not pushing on it, and it's got a lot of energy in it?"

Grammy:  "Elsie, you sound a bit hoarse today."
Elsie:  "I'm not a horse, I'm a unicorn!"

Elsie: struts out of my room in heels and a belt "Ok I'm the mom.  We're going on an adventure today.  But only if you turn your listening ears on!"

Now, I went back and forth on sharing this last one.  But ultimately I find it hilarious and don't want to forget so, sorry Christopher (he voted no), I'm writing it down.

I was making lunch and Elsie was crawling the kitchen.  I wasn't paying too much attention to her jabbering, but then she got louder.

"Mama!  Mama!  I'm tinky (stinky) cunt! I'm a tinky cunt!"

What the hell?  What was my child saying to me??  She said it a few more times.  Then she said she 'paid' me.  A stinky cunt that paid me?  Oh my gosh what?  Then I figured it out.  She was pretending to be a skunk.  But it sounded nothing like skunk.  And she sprayed me.  I could not stop laughing.  I'm not mature enough for this parenting thing.  And no worries, she decided she didn't want to be a skunk anymore.  She wanted to be a titty (kitty).


Oh Elsie girl.  She is a character like nobody else. 

1 comment:

Theresa said...

Im dying! Dying!! The last one was awesome! So awesome. I would not have been able to hold it together. Thank you for sharing!